Telling the Family
Anita said these words with the enthusiasm of an Olympian finding out that they had just won the gold medal. Her sister, mother, and father embraced us in their arms with tears of joy welling up in their eyes as I uttered the words, "We finally did it."
We woke up around 9am after a handful of hours of sleep. I turned over to Anita, who was awakened by my tossing and turning, and asked her if we should call my parents first, thinking that they might head out for the day early. I grabbed my phone and called, the sleep still lingering in my eyes as I navigated the buttons on the phone through the blur.
When my mother answered the phone I could hear in her voice that she knew something was up. We don't normally call this early. Usually, I call my parents while I'm in the car, so they're used to hearing the noises of the road from the handsfree setup.
Telling my parents that Anita is pregnant was extremely difficult. I got through the greeting just fine, asked if Dad could hop on the other line, and then suddenly the words started coming out slowly and one-at-a-time.
"We... are... expecting... a baby," I said while fighting back tears.
Both of my parents cheered from the other side of the phone. My mother has been silently waiting for a grandchild for the past six years since the day Anita and I were married.
"You're going to have thousands of little conversations," my mother said.
Her words have stuck with me ever since that phone call. I'm writing this less than a week later, but I've caught myself thinking back on that phrase every time Anita and I have had a little discussion about what we should do if this-or-that happens.
The conversation was pretty brief. We talked about how happy we all were, and that it was still too early to tell the world.
Our next call was to the doctor's office to schedule a blood test to absolutely confirm the pregnancy and find out how pregnant Anita really was. We went through dates in our head about when the prengnancy started, trying to remember details about the last month and realizing that we were really not very good at pulling specific dates off the top of our heads.
We got an appointment for later in the day. The office is near Anita's parents' house, which would make it even more convenient to stop by after the appointment to break the good news.
The doctor trusts home pregnancy tests.
When we got to our appointment, the doctor asked if we had taken a home pregnancy test. When we told him we had taken two, he said, "Well, then you're pregnant."
Anita got her blood drawn anyway (doctors need to get their money) and we headed out to the in-laws'.
It took us a moment to wade through some initial conversation before Angela delivered the news. We were there with her mother, father, and sister. They were so happy. It was a moment that everyone had been waiting for knowing full well that Anita has wanted to be a mother for a very long time. Her dream was coming true, and so was their's.
Before the day was over, we went around town telling a few other family members. We wanted to make sure that the news stayed close to only the immediate family - knowing full well the risks involved in pregnancy and how uncomfortable that conversation is to have should the unexpected happen.
But really, this is her first pregnancy and my first brush with parenthood. Having the support and advice of those that have gone through this before us is a great thing. When Anita and I have those thousands of little conversations, I'm sure they will be a lot easier with our families there to help us get through them.